meme catch-all.

[coverage]

Comments

[coverage]

and that's just evil. you're the true supervillain in the team, yakkun, i'm kind of into it.

[ kuroo let's not flirt with teammates? maybe?

nah he's too invested in living in the garbage. ]

why would you be going to a bar at forty anyway, that's sad as shit, man.

it's like that movie with brad pitt, you're both gonna age at different rates and then there's this one day where you're both the same age and it'll be weird as hell for everyone.

[yakkun]

I didn't make it to my third year without knowing you were at least a little into me.

[ Take that, lech. ]

... That joke is almost as old as the story you're referencing. And it wasn't funny the first time you told it.

[coverage]

[ is this a game of gay chicken now? a race of chickens? what's the prize here? ]

everyone on my team is attractive, what can i say. that's always been a requirement for nekoma.

i'm the hottest out of all of us, though. you can take second place. kenma doesn't care.

[ h e h . ]

wait when did i tell you that one?

[yakkun]

You are so not the hottest guy on the team. Buy a comb or get a haircut and you might stand a chance.

And you've told that one too many times to count. We'd be here all day if I tried to remember them all.

[coverage]

you're only saying that because you have a Boyfriend, capital B. clean your eyes out.

and that's embarrassing, crap.

did i tell you about the chicken one yet?

[yakkun]

Just because I have a boyfriend doesn't mean I can't tell who's hot.

Does this chicken joke have anything to do with: a road, the other side, or how closely your hair resembles one from the right angle?

[coverage]

so you're admitting to your bad taste in men, got it. RIP yakkun's eyesight.

...dammit.

what other ones?! i have an image to maintain!

[yakkun]

Hey. My taste in men is my own cross to bear.

[ Dating Lev is indefensible. ]

Either way, I'm not your joke book, captain. And I'm sorry to say, I don't listen to every bad one-liner you come up with.

[coverage]

hey, as long as you're both taking care of each other.

i've got no problem kicking either of you off the team otherwise. :)

[ he's playing it off as a joke, but he's pretty serious about the intention behind it. nekoma's volleyball club isn't just some after-school activity for schools like theirs; there's more to it than just hitting a ball over and over. ]

you've been lying to me for the last three years, i can't believe this betrayal's coming from my own freaking house.

[yakkun]

Aw. That was almost sweet of you, Kuroo. Luckily you covered up your human side at the end there.

Oops. I mean: good luck finding a libero on my level if that ever happens.

(And you've got no room to call anyone a liar, you sly schemer.)

[coverage]

hey, you never know how far my shitposter tendencies can get.

[ finding a decent libero in the tokyo prefecture is weirdly difficult, though, come to think of it. ]

i don't actually lie, you know. it's not my fault entirely if people take insinuations for facts. assumptions, asses, that american saying and all.

[yakkun]

If you ever reach your limit, we'll all be very disappointed.

Lying by omission, Kuroo, dear.

[coverage]

bokuto's gonna friendship-divorce me if i did, too. :(

but they can never use that in court against me, yakkun my sweetheart.

okay wow that was weird.

[yakkun]

Oh no. Just imagine the peace and quiet we'd have to endure without Bokuto flapping around.

... sweetheart, huh? That's nicer than most things my actual boyfriend calls me. I'm swooning over here.

[coverage]

all of tokyo will finally understand what it means to have peace and quiet. the horror. i don't want to live in that dystopian world.

darling yakkun. hotcake yakkun. your skinny legs and irritable personality drives me up a wall.

do i need to pull him aside and teach him dirty talk, though, is the question here. i already serve as all-around tutor for half the team as it is.

[yakkun]

[ He's passing on those "compliments because they've left him embarrassed and irritated. The former is, well, embarrassing and the latter just proves Kuroo's second observation. ]

Don't you dare.

What would you even teach him to say?

I'm just asking.

i'm weirdly intrigued now i'm sorry

[coverage]

[ hey, anything to help a friend and comrade out, right? it's not like he's wondering about the level of seriousness involved in his teammates' respective romances. but a healthy team is a happy team, and happy team is easier to motivate and focus.

sometimes he envies fukurodani. bokuto has it easy, since he's a black hole of good-natured attention. nekoma as a collective gets too much like actual cat herding when it's hitting a mood. ]

normally i'd ask what you two get up to in the bedroom, but i honestly don't know if i'm ready for that information just yet.

i don't know, yakkun.

phone sex? people still do that, right?

i wasn't kidding about your legs. lev could talk about that, but his vocabulary's not too great.

hang on, dictionary.

[ homework's done, kenma's ignoring him in chat, and tomorrow's schedule is just drills to death. might as well, life is short. ]

so what i'd usually go for is nasty right out the door, but lev seems like he'd be sweet first then work up to it. tell me if i'm wrong or if it's not working for you?

"i think about you. when you think i'm not paying attention. i think about what you'd say if i suddenly confessed the things i imagine i'd do to you, and with you, if i said it out loud in front of the team.

would you get mad at me?

you'll put me on suicide drills for a week. maybe a month. even if i begged you not to. you'll work me down to the bones and get me on my knees, but it's when you're standing in front me, that you're the most beautiful."





yakkun this is hard. how are you dating him.